The Toe Nail

Cutting my pinky toe nail this morning.

I Clipped.

Toe nail shrapnel ablated directly from my left pinky toe to my left eye.

I am now suing God for my faulty left toe and I'm suing Revlon for marketing a dangerous toe nail clipper without a toe nail deflection device! Additionally there is not warning label on my toe nail clipper warning of the potential for toe nail shrapnel to fly directly into ones ocular pod region!

This is just a blatant disregard for the well being of our fellow man based on our capitalistic anti-individualistic government! If ever there was a time for a call to the concepts of antidisestablishmentarianism that time is NOW!